There are plenty of resorts around the world eager to greet people like these with open, oiled up arms. Whether you’re an experienced swinger or a young couple looking to test the lifestyle for the first time, the one thing everyone talks about after visiting is how welcoming this community is.

Buying lube can be, at best, embarrassing and, at worst, downright confusing, especially if the only type of lube you’ve purchased before is from the drugstore. But if you have resigned yourself to a life of using less-than-perfect lube (or you’ve avoided it entirely), you probably just need to try a different type to notice better results.

As much as sex-positive folks love to say, “Consent is sexy,” and, “If it isn’t a ‘Hell yes!’ it’s a ‘No,’” (two statements I wholeheartedly endorse), the omnipresent existence of rape culture makes understanding the intricacies of consent a bit difficult.

For those who want to keep using Instagram, Daniel Saynt, founder of sex-positive club NFSW, has a few tips. Saynt has been banned from Instagram multiple times, but managed to get his accounts recovered by asking other account holders to message Instagram on his behalf to ask for his account to be reinstated. “Unfortunately,” he says, “when you’re doing things alone you have little chance of getting your account back, but when you’re doing it collectively the amount of messages Instagram receives is enough to make them take notice.”

“And if they're looking for untethered access (in the most literal of terms) to the most successful of their peers, they're not just joining Raya or The Wing. Indeed, NSFW (New Society for Wellness), takes things far beyond mere elbow-rubbing.”

“More so now than ever, enthusiastic consent is something that people are talking about. ‘How do we take people from no means no to yes means yes?’ A lot of that has come from the maturity of the play scene,” Saynt tells Bustle. 

Submissives were decked out with collars and leashes while they and their Doms were treated to some tutorials reviewing consent and safe impact play. 

Saynt continues, “If that connection involves locking genitals, that's cool too, but it's never expected or required.”

“In the basement, next to a king-size bed with a mirrored headboard, mistresses are dominating their submissive male partners, teasingly stroking their penises, squeezing their testicles and pinching their nipples. A woman with red hair and tasteful tattoos is being tied up. She’s doubled over across a bench that looks like something you’d do curls on at a gym. Her tall, bespectacled boyfriend begins striking her back and rear end with a cat-o-nine-tails dungeon whip. With witnesses moving through the space she screams pleasurably, then moans while her companion vigorously fingers her.”

“NSFW's goal is to spread positive messages around sex and cannabis,” says Saynt." “We provide education and judgment-free spaces for a group of people we consider influential in New York City to explore sexually.”