“More so now than ever, enthusiastic consent is something that people are talking about. ‘How do we take people from no means no to yes means yes?’ A lot of that has come from the maturity of the play scene,” Saynt tells Bustle. 

"While past sex experiences may have been less than fulfilling, approaching new partners with a mindset dedicated to gaining the most from each other sexually and a vocabulary to navigate those situations will help you weed through those unwilling to put in the effort and find the gems that really know how to stimulate you."

Saynt continues, “If that connection involves locking genitals, that's cool too, but it's never expected or required.”