What Real Orgasms Feel Like and How to Claim Your Own
If we just listen to movies, songs, and book stereotypes, there’s only one way of having an orgasm. It usually involves squealing, screaming, and “earth-shattering” explosions —dramatic and loud.
The most popular descriptor? “Like fireworks.”
But we forget that on the screens, especially the small ones (pornography), an orgasm is often performative.
The pressure to perform can be rooted in a toxic idea that women and people with clitorises and vaginas must “prove” to our partners that we came. Cue the history of “faking it” in order to please our partners.
Many of us could be coming, but we may not even realize because we aren’t shown how different and complex clitorial, vaginal, and anal orgasms can be. Dispelling the myth that orgasms have to be accompanied by screams or firework feelings isn’t just important for relationships. It’s also about re-educating yourself to increase body awareness and encourage pursuit of pleasure for yourself, not just your partner.